I just read an article on a payday loan site that said that on June 9 Reveal Cosmetics is giving away free Botox injections to the first 50 unemployed people who show up at their office in Arlington, Virginia. It said that Reveal Cosmetics was doing this as sort of a public service to "to help smooth over prospects for recently unemployed, active job seekers." I guess this means you can't be a regular homeless person or a chronically unemployed person. You have to be "recent" and "active." Plus, you have to bring your resume and you also have to bring "proof of unemployment." That seems like quite a lot to require of anyone stupid enough to get Botox injections, but whoever said life makes sense?
I don't know who's running the show at Reveal Cosmetics, but apparently they're not unemployed. Whoever dreamed up this promotional scheme and whoever uttered this tongue-in-check statement on behalf of the company have never been unemployed or in need of money. I have nothing positive to say about a company who would target unemployed people for a Botox promotion.
Being unemployed in these economic times is not amusing for the people who are unemployed. Free is free, however, I have no doubt that Reveal Cosmetics will get their 50 future Botox addicts lined up — and more. There's a fool born every minute, and some of them lose their jobs. But plenty more fools still have jobs and I wonder what in the world possessed Reveal to single out the fools who are unemployed?
I think it's a Google-search thing as well as a misguided feel-good thing. I would imagine that "unemployed" is a hot Google-search term these days. I suppose that Reveal hopes to get a lot of extra internet attention by helping out the unemployed. And I also suppose whoever's running the show feels "good" about doing something to "help" the downtrodden by injecting them with one of the worst natural toxins on earth – provided, of course, that the subjects are "recently" and "actively" downtrodden.
Or maybe it's just that "free" anything has massive appeal, especially for unemployed people. Plenty of people won't question anything that's "free." I've never had a Botox injection, but I can't imagine that a line of 50 people getting Botox injections is going to move very fast. So maybe the reason why the subjects must be unemployed is simply that the employed people have nothing better to do than wait in line all day. Then of course, once you offer up something to the unemployed, especially in an area like Pentagon Row, you're going to have to ward off the street people. After all, street people won't be able to afford to pay for the next round of injections, so you don't want them. By specifying that the unemployed must be the cream of the crop, Reveal is making sure they'll their future Botox addicts will have financial wherewithal to come back for ever-increasing doses.
Botox injections need to be repeated every three to six months. But right now, it's taking longer than that, on average, to find a job. And by the time the most "recently" and "actively" unemployed people land a new jobs they are seriously behind, financially. So for most of the lucky 50, Botox will be just another unattainable dream. Oh well, nice try, Reveal. Next time try taking the 50 people who score highest on an addiction/compulsion profile test.
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